THE MEANING OF MARRIAGE IN ISLAM
Nikah in Islam is the word most commonly employed for marriage which literally means "sexual intercourse". As a legal term, it denotes the situation resulting from a particular contract, entered into by a man and a woman, thereby sexual gratification between them becomes legitimate in the eyes of Allah, as well as the Muslim society.
Furthermore, in Islamic parlance, marriage is held as a divine contract to which Allah Himself is the First Witness and the First Party; hence, it is concluded in His Name, in obedience to Him and according to His ordinances. It is a decent human companionship, authorized and supervised by Allah. (Jundam: 2006)
Benefits of Marriage to Individual, family, or nation
1. With regard to its benefit to Individual: We can readily say that it gives peace to every individual because if the relations of men and women are not sanctioned by marriage which is regulated by the Shari'ah, we will surely find troubles in our midst as everybody will eager to to enjoy the human sexual sensibilities endowed to him or her by Allah regardless of whomsoever he or she will meet on the road or in any other place. The beautiful may overburdened and the ugly may have less clients. Worse above all, some other men will aspire to take the wife of another. Still others will just run away with the daughter of anybody else. There will certainly be troubles everywhere in our society because no husband will bear to see his wife being used by another man and no father will tolerate to see his daughter being kidnapped by a stranger.
On account of marriage allowed by Allah and made it regulated by the Shari'ah, husband and wife are loving each other, mutually helping and respecting one another and restfully contented.
That is precisely the meaning of the verse of the Holy Qur'an herein below qouted:
"And among His signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourseleves, that ye may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts): Verily in that are signs for those who reflect. (30:21)
2. With regard to its benefit to Family
It is an understandable fact that the source of the family is marriage. The family is composed of the spouses and their offsprings. It may enlarge to include ascendants and descendants of far degrees. The relations between the spouses and their children in such a given marriage as well as the relations of the members of the family, however, enlarged and created out of the said marriage are governed by the Shari'ah. If the spouses are faithful to each other in accordance with the intention of Allah expressed in the above-quoted verse of the Holy Qur'an, the family emanating from their marriage will undoubtedly be a good family. The marriage therefore is a source of the family and redounding to its interest.
3. With regard to its benefit to the nation: It is a fact that nations are created out of the families. The families are originated by a husband and a wife. If the families that compose the nation are good, the nation will certainly stand good internally and externally. However, the goodness of the members of the family will depend largely upon the orientations they grasped from their parents and their family environments. Henceforth, marriage, as a source of the nation, is redounding to its benefit.
CLASSIFICATION OF MARRIAGE
Marriage is classified in accordance with the circumstances under which the person entering into it is situtaed and it is of five kinds as follows:-
1. Obligatory (fardh) marriage;
2. Compulsory (Wajib) marriage;
3. Prohibited (Haram) marriage;
4. Disliked but not forbidden (makruh) marriage;
5. Order without obligation (mubah) marriage.
1. OBLIGATORY (FARDH) MARRIAGE:
It is said to be obligatory (fardh) marriage when the person entering into it is financially capable of putting up the necessary expenses of marriage by paying the dower and such other rights of the wife. In addition, the man desiring to marry has no intention to fool the woman he desires to contract a marriage with and that he is certain to fall into fornication if he will not get married.
Requirements of an Obligatory Marriage:
a. A man desiring to marry has the finance to put up all the expenses incidental to the marriage;
b. He has no apprehension at all to deceive the woman he desires to marry during the existence of conjugal relation;
c. He is certain to fall into fornication if he will not get married.
2. COMPULSORY (wajib) MARRIAGE
It is said to be compulsory when all the above-mentioned requirements are present except that the man's apprehension to fall into fornication does not reach the stage of certainty (yaqin).
3. FORBIDDEN OR PROHIBITED (HARAM) MARRIAGE:
It is said to be forbidden or prohibited (haram) when the person contracting it is certain that by doing so he will be fooling the woman whom he will marry and it will therefore be a destruction to her if he marries her. What makes it prohibited is the expected destruction to be inflicted upon the woman. Very surely, anything that will destroy another unjustifiably will consequently be prohibited (Haram) or outlawed.
4. DISLIKED BUT NOT FORBIDDEN (MAKRUH) MARRIAGE:
It is said to be detested or disliked but not forbidden (Makruh) when the person entering into it fears that by doing so he will be fooling and beating the woman he desires to marry although his apprehension does not reach the stage of certainty (yaqin).
5. ORDER WITHOUT OBLIGATION (mubah) MARRIAGE:
It is said to be allowed or ordered without obligation (Mubah) when the person entering into it has all the necessary qualities to contract and finance it and he is certain that by doing so he will not be fooling his wife and he further strongly believes that he will not fall into fornication even if he will not get married.
SELECTION OF SPOUSE
The Shari'ah urges the selection of spouse because Islam as a way of life, wants the spouses to be in a happy and peaceful marriage life and this can only be be achieved by proper selection of a spouse. When a person, therefore, is desiring to marry, he should not hurry it up. He should deliberate upon it very carefully and seriously. He should not only listen to the dictate of his heart. His head must be above his heart because he is actually selecting a life partner, a companion of his existence and a mother of his children who will rear them and help define for them the destiny of their lives in this world and the Hererafter. It has been observed that troubles in a marriage life are usually caused by ill-selection of wives or husbands, as the case may be. Mistakes arise because sometimes men are persuaded by the beauty and wealth of a woman disregarding thereby her faith and character. It is equally true that woman are often allured by the youthfulness and the richness of a man without considering his belief and behavior. (Alauya, 1986).
A person can only make correct selection of a wife by complying with the Prophetic tradition herein below quoted:
"Marry woman with four qualities; first her wealth; second her race; third her beauty and fourth her religion, if you cannot these four, then stict to relious one and you will be blessed."
He further said: "This world is but enjoyable goods and its good is the righteous woman."
